Yep! Yet another random title for a blog, let me explain!
It all started when I was walking down to the Gym at Western Health and Racquets Club on Hyndland Road. It had been a morning of really drizzly rain and I had already been soaked twice so when my IPod shuffled itself to Walking on Sunshine, I was about to hurl it into the middle of Great Western Road.
The gym was very quiet so I had my pick of the machines. I started off with some loud AC/DC on the cross trainer for about seven minutes then onto the treadmill for a bit of serious speed walking. Now as I have said before, the treadmill is where I tend to zone out. My brain seems to shut down and the stride becomes so automatic that I find it relaxing. The only problem is that really random thoughts tend to creep in and even though I had some very loud rock going on in my ears, the rain running the down the Gym windows had my mind wandering off to other songs. I started to think of how many songs there were that had the word raindrops in them, and after finding four, could I remember which film Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head came from? It really started to annoy me and more so when the M word kicked in and I had a mega hot flush. Even after I was off the treadmill and onto the rowing machine it was till bugging me and by this time the sweat drops were falling off my head and my t-shirt was dripping, I still could not remember the film. It was only when I went upstairs and sat on the bike that I remembered, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid!!!!! That famous scene where Paul Newman takes Catherine Ross for a ride on his bike.
By the time I had finished my 20 minutes on the bike, the song was stuck in my head and then it brought back the ending of the film when Butch and Sundance get killed, the M word kicked in and I found my emotions going into overdrive. Luckily I got a text from a friend that made me giggle but this is one of the biggest problems I have been experiencing so far, the shift in emotions. It happens so randomly and usually when I least expect it, strangely it does not happen in work. The other night I found myself crying over stupid advert about a wee boy and a dog, so not right! The sudden change in emotions has another huge downside, I lose my motivation very quickly and start to feel extremely tired and very body conscious. This is going to be a huge hurdle but like the scene in the film where Butch and Sundance hurl themselves off a cliff and into the water even though one of them cannot swim, I still need to find the motivation to keep going. The fight between hormones and reality is going to be huge and will be one very difficult hurdle to get over so much reading needs to be done to understand the whys and wherefores behind it all. Learning is the key!
I finished my Gym session and after a really good stretch, I made my way home with that bloomin song still in my head but missing one verse. It came to me later on …
”But there’s one thing I know The blues they send to meet me won’t defeat me It won’t be long till happiness steps up to greet me”
… and seemed to be very appropriate for my situation.
I guess there are going to be days when the emotions will be high and the hormones will make me feel low but if I can keep my head when the sweat drops are dripping off my face and I hate the look of the person in the mirror, my goal of coping with this phase of my life drug and ”patch” free should be good to go! It would appear that unfortunately one of the things that does keep my focus is working out in the Gym, so perhaps this is another reason to keep the balance going.
So here is to Butch and Sundance who unwittingly helped me figure out a way forward and another way of coping and gave me a bit of a giggle at the same time!
